Musings 004

I've struggled with my confidence recently.  2012 has brought some significant opportunities (check out that positive spin, eh?) for professional and personal growth.  I've been out of my comfort zone a lot these days.  I've made a lot of mistakes.  I've had a few triumphs, but they have largely been outnumbered by mistakes, so I've struggled to mentally embrace those successes.  I'm also probably in a rut...some people are not part of my inner circle of trust have even commented on this (thanks for your opinion on my mental state, but go away!).

So what do you do, when your ego feels perpetually bruised?  And I'm not talking ego in a negative way.  We all need a reasonably positive sense of self to succeed in life.  I set some new personal goals that are only about ME....see my previous post on a half marathon.  I've always found very deep fulfillment from athletic or physical pursuits and I know that about myself.  So why not try to complete 13.1 miles with 14 days notice?  I certainly don't expect to be bragging about my finish time, but I am really looking forward to this race (more than I did last year, I think). 

I've been focusing on being a really good friend these days.  As I've mentioned previously, 2012 has been a rough year for my girl gaggle - premies, sick pups, bridal woes and the list goes on.  And in turn, I've had my own rough patches through which my friends have coaxed me.  Making time for a phone call in the evening or carving out a few hours for dinner and drinks to soothe the nerves and angst of daily stresses are good for the soul.  I know I have a select few friends both locally and just a phone call away who can pull me out of any funk, even if just for a night.

I've also been making time for some of the more mundane hobbies that I deeply enjoy - baking and crafts.  I spent last Sunday in front of my oven working on treats for friends and coworkers....I emerged with buttermilk biscuits (heart-shaped, of course!), cranberry and white chocolate cookies and truffle pops.  All big winners at the office and around the neighborhood.  I'm working on a few craft projects of the paper and sewing variety to channel some of my energy in creative ways. 

With that, I hope my confidence will eventually reemerge to its original state.  If nothing else, just being aware of its dip is something, right?  Being self aware is half the battle of coming out of a funk. And if all else fails, blast Katy Perry's new song "Part of Me" and you're bound to feel a little more empowered!

How do you get yourself out of a confidence rut?